Actual Exchanges Between Pilots And Control Towers
(Orphaned Work)

Tower: "TWA 2341, for noise abatement, turn right 45 Degrees."
TWA 2341: "Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?"
Tower: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"    _________
From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm f***ing bored!"
Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!"
Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f***ing bored, not f***ing stupid!"   _________
O'Hare Approach Control to a 747: "United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o'clock, three miles, Eastbound."
United 329: "Approach, I've always wanted to say this.. I've got the little Fokker in sight."

_________
A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long rollout after touching down.

San Jose Tower noted: "American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadalupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport."   _________
There's a story about the military pilot calling for a priority landing because his single-engine jet fighter was running "a bit peaked."

Air Traffic Control told the fighter jock that he was number two, behind a B-52 that had one engine shut down. "Ah," the fighter pilot remarked, "The dreaded seven-engine approach."

_________
A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich, overheard the following: Lufthansa (in German): "Ground, what is our start clearance time?"
Ground control (in English): "If you want an answer, you must speak in English."
Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany. Why must I speak English?"
Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): "Because you lost the bloody war!"    _________
Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7."
Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway."
Tower: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?"
BR Continental 635: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger. And yes, we copied Eastern.. we've already notified our caterers."   _________
One day, the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee.

Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said, "What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?"

The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like yours and I'll have enough parts for another one."

_________
The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one's gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.

Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway."
Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven."

The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.

Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now."
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?"
Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark and I didn't land."

_________
While taxiing at London's Gatwick Airport, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727.

An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you going? I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it's difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!"

Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: "God! Now you've screwed everything up! It'll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don't move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?"

"Yes, ma'am," the humbled crew responded.

Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high.

Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking, "Wasn't I married to you once?" cheers and happy landings!

UĹźytkownik "TJ_Blues"  napisał w wiadomości
Actual Exchanges Between Pilots And Control Towers

Tower: "TWA 2341, for noise abatement, turn right 45 Degrees."
TWA 2341: "Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?"
Tower: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"

A propos - ktos sluchal tych transmisji w rzeczywistosci ?
Takie zarty sie zdarzaja, czy to zbyt powazna praca, aby byly tolerowane ?

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm f***ing bored!"
Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!"
Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f***ing bored, not f***ing stupid!"

Ale to, to sie moglo zdarzyc :-)

J.

On Monday, September 14, 2015 at 5:00:45 AM UTC-4, J.F. wrote:

Użytkownik "TJ_Blues"  napisał w wiadomości
Actual Exchanges Between Pilots And Control Towers
>Tower: "TWA 2341, for noise abatement, turn right 45 Degrees."
>TWA 2341: "Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make >up here?"
>Tower: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a >727?"

A propos - ktos sluchal tych transmisji w rzeczywistosci ?
Takie zarty sie zdarzaja, czy to zbyt powazna praca, aby byly tolerowane ?

To sa b. stare transkrypcje. Trudno powiedziec, czy sa autentyczne
ale korespondencje z ATC czasem bywaja zabawne:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnLtdEiR_Ug

cheers

On Mon, 14 Sep 2015 18:56:54 -0700 (PDT), TJ_Blues <tomekania.tj@gmail.com> wrote:

To sa b. stare transkrypcje. Trudno powiedziec, czy sa autentyczne
ale korespondencje z ATC czasem bywaja zabawne:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnLtdEiR_Ug

Mnie zaskoczyło to, że ATC może stosować automatyczne komunikaty:
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8WSNAuGDUE

--
Marek

On Tuesday, September 15, 2015 at 3:04:04 AM UTC-4, Marek wrote:

On Mon, 14 Sep 2015 18:56:54 -0700 (PDT), TJ_Blues <tomekania.tj@gmail.com> wrote:
> To sa b. stare transkrypcje. Trudno powiedziec, czy sa autentyczne
> ale korespondencje z ATC czasem bywaja zabawne:
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnLtdEiR_Ug

Mnie zaskoczyło to, że ATC może stosować automatyczne komunikaty:
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8WSNAuGDUE

-- Marek

Jakbys gadal prawie to samo z czestotliwoscia kalasznikowa przez kilka godzin,
to tez zdarzyloby Ci sie odpowiedziec komus rutynowo i bez sensu; Tu okreslone
jako odopowiedz utomatyczna (an automatic response). Nie wiem skad wziales
"automatyczny komunikat"?  OK, chodzilo Ci o zwiekszenie pierwiastka humoru
w tej sytuacji :-)

Polecam: http://www.liveatc.net/

cheers

On Tue, 15 Sep 2015 05:44:24 -0700 (PDT), TJ_Blues <tomekania.tj@gmail.com> wrote:

Jakbys gadal prawie to samo z czestotliwoscia kalasznikowa przez

kilka godz

in,
to tez zdarzyloby Ci sie odpowiedziec komus rutynowo i bez sensu;

Tu okresl

one
jako odopowiedz utomatyczna (an automatic response). Nie wiem skad

wziales

"automatyczny komunikat"?  OK, chodzilo Ci o zwiekszenie

pierwiastka humoru

w tej sytuacji :-)

Ale moment, mówimy o machinalnym czy automatycznym? Kontekst sugerował automatyczny komunikat czyli odtwarzany z nagrania (jak zapowiadacz na dworcu w Poznaniu), myślałem, że konttoler ma nagrane swoje najczęściej padające teksty i w tym przypadku wcisnął zły guzik (odtworzył źle nagranie).

--
Marek

@Marek Nie. Nagranie nic takiego nie sugeruje. Kontroler mowisz, że odpowiedzial rutynowo nie weryfikujac, że owy samolot juz oderwal sie od pasa / lub bez sprawdzenia callsign tego, ktory znajduje sie na pasie.

@Marek Kontroler tlumaczy sie mowiac: it becomes an automatic response sometimes. Czyli po naszemu: Cases odpowiedzi staja sie automatyczne (odruchowe).

On Tue, 15 Sep 2015 08:12:44 -0700 (PDT), TJ_Blues <tomekania.tj@gmail.com> wrote:

@Marek Kontroler tlumaczy sie mowiac: it becomes an automatic

response sometimes. Czyli po naszemu: Cases odpowiedzi staja sie automatyczne (odruchowe).

To moĹźna róşnie tłumaczyć. Wielokrotnie się spotkałem, Ĺźe uĹźyty  zwrot "automatic response" doytyczył odpowiedzi generowanej przez _automat_ (jak samą nazwa wskazuje) a nie machinalnej (gdy  dotyczy zachowania człowieka).

--
Marek

On Thursday, September 17, 2015 at 5:08:18 AM UTC-4, Marek wrote:

On Tue, 15 Sep 2015 08:12:44 -0700 (PDT), TJ_Blues <tomekania.tj@gmail.com> wrote:
> @Marek Kontroler tlumaczy sie mowiac: it becomes an automatic response sometimes. Czyli po naszemu: Cases odpowiedzi staja sie automatyczne (odruchowe).

To można różnie tłumaczyć. Wielokrotnie się spotkałem, że użyty  zwrot "automatic response" doytyczył odpowiedzi generowanej przez _automat_ (jak samą nazwa wskazuje) a nie machinalnej (gdy  dotyczy zachowania człowieka).

-- Marek

Kontekst i calosc wypowiedzi nie wskazuje na uzycie wyrazaenia "an automatic
respnse" w sensie nagranego i odtworzonego zapisu przy uzyciu automatu.
Uwierz mi. Nie jestem specjalista od lingwistyki ale angielski jest jezykiem,
ktory uzywam codziennie od blisko 20 lat; Mieszkam w Kanadzie....

cheers